The Winds of Change and the Minimum Wage

It’s been a while since I’ve reported as I’ve been busy with a great number of investigations. Now that the economy has improved, I was thinking of hiring some help in my investigative endeavors until I spoke with my newly elected Republican representative from Texas, Louis “Gomer Pyle” Gomert. Shoot, I’m not even from Texas and don’t now and never have even considered it a legitimate state. That’s beside the point. Until the recent elections in Kansas, I always found the most solace in Texas with knowing that I was smarter than elected officials from that state, thus my personal interests could best be protected there. Anyway, I digress. Now, there are things I admire greatly about Texas, Willie Nelson and Lyle Lovett. Unfortunately, that about sums the whole deal up. See, I sat down in the Buffalo Turd Café in West Pecos the other day with Louie Gomert to discuss politics and the economy and such. Louie is really feeling his oats these days…both of them. So, he’s decided to buck the trend which has been gaining strength across the country with those wanting to raise the minimum wage. Even Arkansas raised their own minimum wage. Louie sees things differently. He is proposing that we LOWER the minimum wage by about a buck fifty per hour. At this point I was pretty sure I would hear the logic following to state that this would help the working poor by enabling the wealthy employers to hire more folks. I disagree with that philosophy as having once been a small business guy I full well know that one doesn’t hire more people merely because they have more money to do so. Nope! They hire more people because they have more customers for their goods and services. Without more customers, hiring more people is nothing but welfare. There’s not much profit in that unless you’re a private contractor who gets a gig with the government after you make a sizable campaign contribution to someone…well, like Louis Gomert. So, realizing my mistake, I became glued to Louie’s explanation for his wage lowering proposal. See, there has been a significant drop in the cost of gasoline over the past six months ago or so. This has resulted in an unexpected, and according to Louie, an unearned windfall in the pockets of the undeserving poorer of our society and they have done nothing to earn it. Therefore, per Louie, we should lower the minimum wage to an approximate equal amount of the savings garnered by these low wage workers via gasoline savings. This would result in a net benefit to the wealthier employer who would not need to hire more folks because it would do nothing to increase the number his customers. Furthermore, it would bolster the coffers of the government because they would no longer need to grant such excessive tax breaks to these employers in exchange for campaign contributions. The poorer would be just as poor and who cares? Not Louie and that’s for sure. As the sun set over the Buffalo Turd Café in West Pecos, I left Louie and pondered what this country was becoming or has become. I rolled down the window and sucked some West Texas dust knowing I’d never return, while Lyle Lovett occupied my CD player with the words “But the winds of change, They fill the air, And you can't set your hat down Just anywhere.” From the ballad, Don’t Touch My Hat. Yippee, ki yay, git along little doggies and all that……..